Words you never want to hear.
But I heard them from my mum, and also from my vet, in the space of a couple of weeks.
Both mum and Bella have had ops to remove their lumps. Mum’s wound is healing nicely, but Bella’s wound, a pretty nasty one already post operation, got even nastier.
The results back from the test on Bella's removed lump were not great news, the wound was horrific and we set a time and date to have Bella put to sleep.
But then…
We discovered the cause of the stomach churning wound was antibiotic resistant bacteria - and in a few days, with the right antibiotic, the wound started to improve.
The op was 5 weeks ago and the wound is still raw in the middle, but growing smaller all the time.
So far, 5 weeks of wearing 2 Buster collars on her head (being three-quarters Irish Setter, she has a very small but long neck and so the poor girl has to wear a large buster collar due to her body size plus a smaller one inside to stop the big one falling off her neck (even when it is tied to a collar)!
Is it worth it? The pain and discomfort she has been through? The expense. The time. 5 weeks, so far, of sleeping in the lounge with her?
5 frustrating weeks of trying to apply dressings to the moving part of a silky haired leg!
Have we made the right decision for Bella? For us? These decisions are so hard. We can’t see into the future.
Maybe you’ve been through something similar, maybe even worse.
It has made me realise how much I love this girlie. I’ve invested a lot of my recent life into her life - particularly as she has been a challenging dog to live with. Basically she has changed my life - she is the reason I got into dog training! And she has given so much back.
Our walks are currently not the same as they were - they are much shorter on exercise and we now spend time just sitting in the shade in a quiet spot watching the nature around us.
It’s like being with an old friend - no need for words, we just enjoy being in one another’s company.
Love you Bellz xxx